“A thing with a brave spirit is not mean.”
St. Mawr, D.H. Lawrence
I just realized something. All my so-called life in so-called journalism, all I was ever doing was looking for genuine expression of emotions, through the human voice. I love the human voice, when it is being honest. It’s an instrument like no other. Like a Stradivarius. For this reason, I oppose the email interview, as well as the notion of “trimming” transcripts after the fact, cleaning up the voice. (This was a fierce argument I had with both Liam Scheff, and Christine Maggiore, who both believed that cleaning up dissenting scientists voices would hasten the collapse of the HIV empire.) (It didn’t.)
A real scientist sounds like nobody else. A fake scientist sounds like hundreds of others.
Anna Akhmatova famously said: “We must never forget about despair.” This is not an American idea–we are afraid of despair. We like successfully repressed people in this culture.
Last night as I listened to this voice, of Laura Loomer, screaming helplessly: “Shame!! Shame on all of you! Shame!” (Video below) I was riveted, because I was hearing a genuine human cry. Until I listened to it, motionless from start too finish, I did not realize how long I’d been waiting for it. She sounded like somebody screaming into the Atlantic iceberg before the collision. She sounded like I feel. (Yet I rarely make a sound.)
Inside the theater she had been dragged out of by security, the actors had been doing what actors do: Simulating the emotions of the famous play. We’re always told that great theater and great actors provide, as the ancient Greeks defined it, “catharsis.” I have rarely, if ever, experienced that in a theater, and rarely go see plays as a result. This rendition of Julius Caesar is now a juggernaut of palatable emotions that are not classical or eternal, rather, a “period piece,” delivering fascistic mass sentiment —Trump hatred. I would argue that mass (political) emotions can never be real emotions, they can only ever be positions. You can’t have a political emotion, only a political persuasion. In addition, you can’t have an emotion that millions of other people are also having at the same time.
I was very moved by Laura Loomer. It was not until today that I stopped to think about it more carefully. Was she the real play, lasting a few seconds, bursting forth like the shackled ID of a brainwashed society?
You can argue whether plays should be disrupted–I would always argue in favor. I would expect most playwrights to agree. A play is alive, or should be.
Loomer, intentionally or accidentally, transformed (in moments) a very petit bourgeois night-at-the-theater moment into a wild avant grade living theater moment. She interrupted a fake play with a real one, a one woman tragedy in one act. (“Tragedy” is an internal measure of despair–should not be used to describe events.) She interrupted safe emotionalism with the very dangerous emotion that was not permitted to enter the theater, or for that matter, the culture. It must remain on the deplorable, dirty fringes. I would sooner hurl myself into the jaws of Siberian tigers who hadn’t seen food in 2 weeks than do what Loomer did. You can say many things about it, (echoing Bill Maher) but you can’t say it was not brave. Loomer went in without a single trapping–no platform, hub, alt-right, boy’s club, back-lit American flags, website, gang, badge–nothing but her own voice.
Americans of all ethnicities and backgrounds who oppose Trump hatred, and the escalating normalization of the “Kill Trump” meme, people who may or may not “support” Donald trump, yet despair at the ugliness that has arisen in the name of crushing him–these people feel voiceless.
I am one of them. Laura Loomer screamed bloody murder, on behalf of that missing voice, that voice that can’t find a home, can’t find a culture that understands or hears it.
In her wild screams, I heard my own muffled, muted, defeated emotions. The cry for it to stop–for the bullying, cruelty, savagery, the attacks on the politically incorrect “other,” to stop. If not “stop,” to at least acknowledge, in a brief moment of respite, its own brutality–its palatable disavowed sadist. Being a liberal lefty in the Trump era means being safe, and having the power of the bully majority always on your side.
Laura Loomer opened an audio track, so all those smug, air-conditioned theater loving, Trump despising liberals, got to, or had to, hear a shard of the pain they cause, support, and proliferate. Unless, as Tennessee Williams once put it, “you devote yourself to its opposition.”
Julia Caesar meets Laura Loomer https://t.co/THlerwmODp
— Laura Loomer (@LauraLoomer) June 17, 2017